Priming yourself

You prime yourself before big events, such as a big exam, a serious presentation, or a tough conversation.

You know it is very important to prepare fully and give your best fully during those important occasions.

How do you do priming on a daily basis?

We encounter many things and need to make hundreds and thousands of decisions daily. We need to be present and do our best to live our true self and happy and fulfilled self. Therefore, we need prime ourselves constantly.

The daily priming does not have to be long or complicated.

You can build up your routine to do priming, for example, in the morning every day. You can do priming every evening if you prefer. You can do the priming during the day when you get a moment, a few minutes – interval, may do the trick. After some practice, you will find your rhythm to get your mind and emotion to be your best,

You can use meditation, yoga, running, walking, reading, writing, self-talking… anything that suits your pace and style to do your priming.

The key of priming is to get yourself to the present, enjoy and fully express yourself.

Priming yourself constantly is a life style. It is the connection and bridge of who are you and what do you want to the present. Priming yourself is the platform to live your life purposely and fully.

One step at a time

We are living in a UVCA (uncertainty, volatility, complexity, ambiguity) time. Everything changes fast with many dimensions.

We are lost from time to time, don’t see clearly which road to take forward. This is not uncommon. No frustration or panic is needed during these periods.

What we need is to put one foot in front of another – one step at a time, towards our big goal and destination.

We need have faith for ourselves. We need determination towards our purpose. We need keep going, focus our next step and move, no stopping.

We judge people from their action, not what they say.

We build our “Great Wall” from laying one brick at a time. Therefore, keep going, little by little, we will get there.

What is your story?

You made New Year’s resolutions. You could not keep them to the end of the year.

You made goals and milestones for your work. You did not carry on to complete them.

You have dreams and ambitions. You haven’t started your actions to pursue them…

These sound familiar, right?

What did happen there? What stories did you tell yourself? Did you realize you were tell yourself something when you stoped action as you planed?

May be you heard that you were telling yourself that today I felt tired, I need a break; or you were telling yourself that this is so hard, why not enjoy my life instead…; or you were telling yourself that why should I work that hard when someone else can cheat and get away with it…; or you were telling yourself that I have my dream, but I can do something about it on another day….and another day never comes.

If you do not catch the small talks you have with yourself. You may be drafting, wondering and wasting your time and your life.

What is your life purpose?

Socrates said that an unexamined life not worth living.

Take a pause, reflect what you have been doing and what you have been telling yourself. Take meditation, evaluate your life.

Only when you begin listen to yourself, examine if your stories are in alignment with your life purpose, you then can redirect your energy and your focus to where you want to go.

Get your stories right. Go with your stories.

Live your best now

When we have something good, we easily want to save it for later. Sometimes, later never arrives.

Actually this is a perfect signal that we need to use this good stuff – it may be a good idea, a good read, a good conversation… whatever it is, you need to act on it.

Only then you are doing your best, you are living your best life freely. You do not hold back from anything. You are stretching, growing and making a difference.

You do not need reservation. If you have anything good, use it, live it.

Live your best life now.

Hold your stake

We live a life with a purpose, even though sometimes we are not clear about our purpose. But, we all do live a purposeful life – no exception.

Your purpose in life is your stake.

So, what is your stake in life?

What are the things in you that are true you? And you will never yield or give them up. If you compromise any of them, you will feel you loose yourself. You get to keep these to be intact, to be able to keep your integrity.

That is your stake.

The reality is more complicated than we can prepare for. We are challenged daily for various matters. These matters change our stake. They bring fears to us. They make us feel vulnerable. They make us fell imposters. They also confuse us…

It is imperative to hold your stake, no matter what has happened.

Your stake is your identity. You stake is the truth to yourself. Your stake is your life boat. Your stake gives your hope, energy and clarity.

I don’t compromise my stake because others go low. I don’t compromise my stake because I am tired. I don’t compromise my stake because my boss, my fellow colleagues, or my friends have done so. I don’t compromise my stake because of temporary benefits or promotion…

I need to have a peaceful sleep to hold on my stake. I need to hold my stake to live freely as who I am, which gives me the ultimate happiness.

Hold you stake.

Find your rhythm

Life is a marathon, which does not end as long as you live.

We may run very fast sometimes. We may need stop to have some foods, drinks, and rest, in order to continue our marathon.

We need plan methodically about our life and work – find that pace, that rhythm , that balance suits us for different segments of our journey,

Our purpose and goals in life are our compass. How to get there is our tactics. We need trial and error to figure out our tactics – the system or structure for our routines, so that we can work hard and have enjoyable time as well.

Find your rhythm:

Plan your day: goal of the day? morning routine, evening routine, divide your day into different blocks, each block has its focused point…
Plan your week: what is the goal of the week? Divide it into five sub-goals for the week…
Plan your weekend: recap? Recharge? Or build up social connections?
Plan your month: goal of the month? Divide it into sub-goals for each week…
Plan your six month: goal of the half year? Divide it into monthly goal…
Plan your goal of the year: divide it into six month goal…

Your rhythm building plan may include these areas: your career, your personal growth plan, your milestones, your health maintaining plan, your social networking plan, your relationship with your significant other, your relationships with your other family members and friends, your financial plan, your leisure plan.

Where are you for the above areas? Where would be your ideal position for each area? How are you to get your ideal position if there is a gap for any of the area?

Do what you love

When you do what you love, you don’t feel you have to go to work, because you enjoy it so much, you live and enjoy your life.

Work becomes your life. The purpose of your work is in sync with your personal meaning. You look forward to your work. Your works makes you happy.

This is an ideal picture.

Not everyone is lucky to find that ideal work. They may get a job. Some of them may even realize later that the job is actually what they love to do.

However, find the work you love in general needs you know what you want at the first place.

Know what you want means you have to know yourself. What energizes you? What resonates with you? What do you want achieve? Where do you want to start? Are you ready to take No as an answer? What stories do you tell yourself? What does a resistance telling you? …

It’s always easier to find a work you love, but it’s difficult to find a means to get there.

To do a work you love becomes a journey to know yourself first. So go to know yourself, it’s never too late to do so.

Internal compass

Ships need compass on the sea to get where they need to go.

We need our internal compass to guide us doing things we need to do.

What is our compass?

I feel good when I have a goal in life and at work. Because with a goal in mind it gives me clarity. Clarity empowers me for my action. My action makes me feel I am producing something to the world, showing my value, and getting closer to the goal.

A goal or purpose can be a compass.

I feel engaged with a company when the company’s mission reflects my personal values as well. My engagement with the company makes me looking forward to work each day. I am pumped and happy doing what I do at work.

A mission and our values can be our compass.

What else can be a compass?

What can make you feel meaningful? What would be your calling? What can get you up from the bed every day? What can make you so excited that you get to do it? …

If you can find your answers to any of the questions, you find your compass.

We are running a life-long marathon. We need different compasses for different stages of our life. Therefore, our compass is a moving target. However, this is exactly the fun in life. We get to find it from time to time. That’s how we move forward.

Take a pause sometimes. Check your internal compass. Are you going with the direction of the compass? It would be a much better journey when you go with your internal compass.

Job security depends on what?

I have a friend, who moved to a new and an executive position of a medium company. She was excited with this opportunity and worked very hard for the first a few months to learn and adapt to the new environment.

Nine months into her position, she was screwed by a senior colleague. And the fears from the new colleagues regarding the changes brought by her did not help. She suddenly had to face a challenge that most of her middle management members wanted her out by signing a petition letter.

She was mad at the surprise – not knowing what’s going on, where went so wrong…

Many meetings and tough conversations later, it turned out that the senior colleague played a crucial role to stir the pot which he had been adding explosive ingredients. Long story short, most of the colleagues eventually realized that my friend is a reliable, kind, trustworthy, wise person. They have accepted her after all.

This is lucky for her, you may say.

I was curious about her feeling during the tough period.

“Did you feel unsafe about your job?” I asked.

“No.” She said.

“Why?”

“Because I was true to my self for everything I did. I did not feel I need apologize for anything or anyone for what happened, What frustrated me was why did it happen? Why I was so blinded?…” She explained.

Later I learned that she had fears, fearing that she could not do her best, fearing she could not accept by her teams… of course, she makes mistakes has this imposter syndrome as well. However, she never had the concern about her job security.

I know her well enough to understand her security about herself. Because she is the kind of indispensable person I know of. She does things with her heart and soul with generosity. She is the kind of person I would call Linchpin, as Seth Godin stated in his book. She has vitality and longevity for what she does. She does not have much time or room to worry about her job, because she has too much fun and curiosity towards life and work.

Job security comes with dedication, devotion and love towards to what you do.

Job security comes with initiatives and creation.

Job security comes with clarity about what you do.

When you are indispensable, job security is not in your way.

Dance with fear

We encounter fear often if we are growing – grow personally, grow our work, grow our family… this is normal.

Fear is usually telling us the very thing we need to do, to get to do, to grow out of it.

It is how we deal with fear that boosts, deters, and ultimately measures our growth.

Dance with fear is the way moving forward.

Dance with fear means we face it. We see it. We are aware what intimidates us. We know where it comes.

Dance with fear means we are going to move forward with it. We can’t get rid of it. But we can still go, go, go while being with it.

Dance with fear means leadership. We know we are vulnerable, yet we get to do it any way. We know we might not be right, yet we do our best anyway.

Dance with fear is how we can make one step at a time, little by little we can be better. Therefore, we can do better things.